I Escaped a Rite of Passage

So, Here's something true and baffling:
I have never in my life created a PowerPoint presentation. Not once. How did this travesty happen? How did I get through all of high school in suburban America without creating a PowerPoint on the Industrial Revolution? How did I squeak through a liberal-arts degree without giving a presentation on religion in Western Civilization? How did I ever survive without Clip Art stick figures pointing to bullet statements? How can I feel right with the world when I've never made a dream-sequence transition to go along with a cartoon sound effect?

And the truth is, it has haunted me. I always thought it was right around the corner, in my next class, or as the next assignment. But the anticipation kept building, and my time never came. Eventually, I gave up hope. And then I began to resent PowerPoint and all its experienced users. Whenever I received a forwarded email with a .ppt extension, I would mutter in disgust, all the while secretly envious that here was yet another person who had done what I could not.

Until now.

Because tonight, I learned how to use PowerPoint. Nay, I taught myself how to use PowerPoint! So watch out. I'm going to be unstoppable now.


Next up, I'll finally watch Star Wars.